“Be yourself. Life is precious as it is. All the elements for your happiness are already here. There is no need to run, strive, search or struggle. Just Be.” ~ Thich Nhat Hanh
[Editor’s note: This is a guest post by Lindsey Lewis who blogs at Libre Living.]
Yup, I’m a yoga teacher—among other things—and generally speaking an all-round happy-go-lucky gal. Life is FULL of wonder, peace, love, and flow.
“Oh sure, but you’re a yoga teacher. You have less stress than other people do.” I know, I know, I’m a yogi, so I spend all day on some mat or another, meditating, chanting, or deep breathing. In my hemp clothing. With my double-strand mala beads. Om.
In reality, I–like most people trying to make a living being of service–am working my buns off, as I blog, teach, life coach, facilitate corporate lunch ‘n’ learns, market all these offerings, and do other projects to keep my income reasonable.
Here’s why I’m telling you this: my life now is busier, more demanding, and takes more energy and time than it did before I quit my former 9-5 dream job so I could “help people live healthier, happier lives.” But I’m way less stressed today. I spent a good chunk of my life struggling with pretty debilitating anxiety–basically an ongoing stress response that doesn’t go away–and finally got to the point where “the pain of remaining the same became greater than the pain of changing.” The pain of remaining the same translated into insomnia, an inability to digest food properly, regular panic attacks–even at the office–and a constant sense of feeling someone’s hands around my throat, squeezing tightly. Fun! At least I can say I developed a lot of strength.
I also developed a keen desire to feel differently–to feel peace, strength and happiness–and to share what I learned with other people. I’ve been boosting those skills since 2006, when I signed up for yoga teacher training.
Here’s some of my top take-aways I learned along the ever-calmer and stronger ride—and now teach to others.
1. Labelling thoughts. Thoughts are thoughts; it doesn’t matter if they’re worrying ones, planning ones, rehashing ones, or imagining ones. We can practice labelling our thoughts as simply “thinking,” or get more specific with “worrying,” “rehashing,” “planning,” or imagining. Either way, by labelling them we often find some space between our essential, ultimately calm and strong selves, and our worrying mind. The labels help us to recognize what’s happening and take charge of what’s happening in our head, rather than letting our monkey mind run the show. “I’m imagining, and I know I do that when I’m worried or feeling anxiety. It doesn’t actually help. So I’m going to let those thoughts go, and move onto something else.”
2. Be here now.The best something else we can move onto is this present moment. This moment, though it might seem overwhelming, can become a tool for anchoring into grounded stability and strength. Mindfulness techniques using our senses enable us to focus our attention and intention.
- Sight. What do you see? If you’re supposed to be concentrating on talking to your son, daughter, or even a group of work colleagues but you feel unable to focus, try lasering in on one visual aspect: a forehead, pen, or friendly face.
- Sound. This works the same way. Try lasering in on the sound of someone’s voice, or a sound outside the room.
- Touch. What do you feel? Bring your intention and attention to one sensation you can physically feel–your toes moving in your shoes, or your fingertip on the table or presentation stand.
- Smell. What can you smell? Try narrowing in on a scent that’s pleasing or even soothing to your aural palette. Lavender is a good one–you could even have some in your pocket.
- Taste. This is my least favourite one, but it works, too. Pop a mint and keep on keepin’ on with whatever you’re doing, but noticing the tastes that arise on your tongue.
3. Walking meditation. Anytime you’re walking anywhere is a good time to practice mindfulness. Notice the sensations beneath your feet, when your heel connects with the floor and then your weight rolls to the ball of your foot. Just notice it, and you’ll notice yourself coming deeper into your physical experience of the moment, and out of your overwhelmed, anxious mind.
4. Multi-tasking myth. Nobody can truly do more than one thing at a time. (I like to talk on the phone while folding laundry or doing dishes, but, as my mom is quick to point out, when I do that the conversation is a lot less involved.) We’re most comfortable and calm when we’re mindful and that’s easiest to do when we’re doing one thing at a time. I know, it’s not always possible. But most of us can do less multi-tasking. Check email every 20 minutes instead of every time one comes in. Turn your cell phone alerts off so that you’re in charge of when you respond to texts or emails. Consider letting the phone ring if you’re in the middle of something. Give yourself permission to focus on what’s important to you.
5. Body boost. Our body is right here, right now. Bringing our attention and intention into our body is a highly effective way to counteract the overwhelmed response–where we feel scattered and unfocused. Simply notice what’s happening–especially around your neck and shoulders, chest and throat and stomach. Are your ears up around your neck? Is your throat constricted? Is your breath stuck in your chest and is your stomach tense?
6. Get physical. Once you’ve noticed what’s happening in your body, you’re already halfway towards counteracting the overwhelmed response. The mind and emotions are not separate from the body. They are somatic. So changing your physical reactions will change your emotional-mental reactions. Want proof? Smile. Hold it for at least six seconds. Notice the physiological reactions. So when you notice your shoulders up around your ears, let them drop. When your breath is stuck up in your chest, take your inhale and exhale all the way down to your belly. Feel the difference.
7. Use your breath. On that note, long, deep yoga breathing brings balance to your nervous system by activating the calming systems in your body, including our parasympathetic nervous system, while de-activating the activating systems in our body, including our sympathetic nervous system.
8. Use your breath II. Need something more powerful? When I need to really bring up and let go of some deep stress or tension I do a minute or two of rounds of deep exhales through my mouth.
9. Practice loving-kindness. You are who you are for a reason. We come into this life with mental and emotional patterns (samskaras, in yoga-speak) that I believe can help teach us how to be the best we can be—even ones we perceive as negative. Every worrying pattern, stress pattern, or losing your temper pattern is a tool that we can use to evolve towards our best selves. How? Loving-kindness. Surround that ‘negative’ reaction with unconditional love. Instead of beating ourselves up for feeling overwhelmed, anxious or angry, we just sit with that feeling, noticing everything there is to notice about it. Getting curious about it. “So this is overwhelmed. Huh. I feel this in my stomach, this way in my chest, this way behind my eyes. I seem to be having a hard time accepting the fact that I feel this way. I’m going to shift that into accepting that I feel this way—because feeling this way is an indication of my deeply open, ultimately loving nature.”
10. Lovingly let go. Once we get into the habit of practicing loving-kindness towards ourselves and our patterns, we can get into the habit of letting those patterns go. Because, as Swiss psychiatrist Carl Jung said “What we resist persists.” When we stop resisting our patterns, and instead dive right into them, they minimize and sometimes even vamoose—all on their own.
Good luck! I sincerely hope you found these de-stress yoga tips helpful,